Critical Reflection

     A Note to Grief is meant to represent families who are suffering with a loss. The main character Lucas shows one side of coping with grief, as he shelters himself off from others, and is unable to maintain previous connections and relationships, as well as form new connections with people. He is forced to grieve the loss of his older brother alone, because his mother is unable to support him emotionally. His character in the beginning of the film shows the certain numbness as he tries to ignore his emotions. However, when his mother begins to show him the notes from Nic, he is forced to confront his grief, and all the pain he has been so desperately trying to ignore. So when he finally sees his mother on the couch surrounded by notes, revealing that she is the one who has been writing these notes from Nic, he is overcome with emotion. Lucas is a teenage boy, who is in a time where he is still unable to process the loss of his brother alone, and takes the example of his mother who sheltered herself from him. She was overcome by the pain of her eldest child’s death, unable to support or comfort her youngest when she was barely able to keep herself afloat. The mother represents people who attempt to ignore their emotions with alcohol; a temporary solution which will not yield results in the end. She prefers to numb herself with substances, rather than have  to think about the death, rather than feel her sadness and her anger for the life that has been taken. However, she finds the notes written to Lucas from Nic and is brought back to the moments she had with Nic, just months ago.

The low lighting and thought out use of cool versus warm tones create a sense of branding. A Note to Grief is not initially a happy story. It is about a boy and his mother who are mutually struggling with a death. The image on the film post card shows the main character, Lucas, alone in a black void. This is meant to show how Lucas feels solitaire and helpless in the beginning of the film, which is a major part of out brand. Reaching out to people who feel alone, stuck in a cycle of grief, and showing them the need for support from those around them. One side features Lucas and his mother , facing away from each other, paths not crossing, and the other side shows the two together. This shows the two sides of this story. Solely showing the dark atmosphere would not do well to demonstrating the fact that there is an out from depressive grief. It would entirely contradict the message, and make it seem as if being trapped in grief and forcing oneself to forget about their loved one is right. Instead, Lucas is forced to see the light, is forced to relive and revisit old happy memories. So, the post card will force the audience to revisit them along side Lucas.

I tried to make every element as engaging as possible. Take my social media for example; I used casting pictures, a teaser, and a number of behind the scenes footage which includes makeup, shot setup, footage of filming, and the cast having fun, which is efficient to break the barrier between audiences who are bored by are too “serious” business accounts. Throughout the film and on my postcard, I used darker and cooler tones, which sets the scene for the sorrow nature of the film. However, only in memories and the end, when the family is connected is the scene lightened and warmer. The contrast was very important to gain audience attention, because a strictly sorrow and dark portrayal won’t appeal to the viewers who want to see the emotions. This would also not do well to demonstrate the story and our brand, as it would become a more depressing and one sided story.

 My research helped me to get a grasp on what it takes to create a short film. I have never created something like this yet, something that portrays an entire story from beginning to end. I was initially not sure how to go about it, and was afraid of overestimating the amount of footage I would need, which would make editing far more difficult. My researched helped me to understand just how straight to the point a short film has to be. Because of the shortened time span, low budget, and staff, short films are no time or money to waste explaining details. This however does not mean there is any room for error in leaving plot holes. For my short film, I left the reasoning for Nic’s death up in the air, because the reason was not necessary to the story I want to tell. I also wanted to include a scene at the end that shows how Lucas and his mother were able to grow together, however that is also not necessary, because it isn’t about their growth after Nic’s death, it’s about the mother and son reconnection.

Thank you all for following this journey for the past two years!

Tchau!!

Project components

 Here is the link to the drive with A Note to Grief -short film

And here is the link for my print component

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/notetogrief_shortfilm?igsh=bWNwaXBpczU1Nnhw&utm_source=qr

Character analysis and casting

    BREAKING NEWS!

    WE HAVE A CAST!! A few nights ago I talked to Diana, and asked if she was interested in being a part of my short film. I have known Diana since 2023, where we performed a school musical together. I think she'd be a good pick because I can trust that she will take the role seriously. The only problem with her casting, is that she is not very available for filming. I will be off on spring break as of the 22nd, so Diana will be traveling. Here is the conversation I had with her. 

So Diana will be playing the mother, and Martin will be playing Lucas. I wrote a character analysis on the mother and on Lucas, so that the two would have something to work off of when acting.

LUCAS is a 16 year old boy, who lost his biggest supporter a year ago. His older brother Nic, age 18, has been with him through everything.  The little letters Nic would leave for him with encouraging words, inside jokes, playful lines, or reminding him of how much he is loved, helped him through his day. He saved every last one in a little box that he then kept in his desk, out of sight after he died. For a while after Nic died, Lucas would revisit that box and read the letters at night until he exhausted himself from crying and would fall asleep. Lucas is in the middle of high school, a pivotal point in his development. His mother shut herself down, and he followed her example, cutting out his friends, isolating himself. He feels the pain of isolation, of never having processed his grief, anger, sadness, every moment; yet he pushes them down out of fear of breaking down completely, and tries to forget the memories of his brother. Said by Empathy.com, “This is a common response to intense experiences known as crisis fatigue. The body responds to severe stress by releasing adrenaline and other stress hormones. When the crisis has passed, this high-energy situation will have fatigued your system.” Confronting his grief will destroy the time he’s spent trying to push it down just to keep himself sane. What once was a soothing memory to get him to fall asleep, is not a blackened and cold part of him he tries so hard to forget. He also knows if he does break down, his mother won’t be able to be there for him, just as he can’t be there for her. 

The reappearances of the letters from Nic are exactly what it takes to break him apart. He doesn’t understand where they’re coming from, but he cares more about just keeping away, keeping the memories and mourning at bay. He is even more freaked out when he sees the new notes written, and realizing that it was his mom this whole time, with all the notes past written, he is overwhelmed by the memories and the sorrow. In the end, he sees the pain in his mothers eyes, and fully sees her for the first time since before Nic died, and realizes they’ve been going through the same thing. He realizes she needs him just as much as he needs her.

MOTHER is the single parent of two boys. Lucas is 16, and Nic was 18 when he passed away of causes unknown to the audience. She loves her sons more than anything, and the death of her first born felt like a shot in the heart. She loves her sons equally, but losing one of them took over her entire life, feeling like her very soul has been ripped out of her. She feels disgusted and angered by fate and injustice, but more than anything she wishes she could have done more to help him, that she could have saved him. She isn’t even sure she can survive the grief. While Lucas is able to ignore his pain to numb himself, she found that the only thing that numbs the pain is by drinking until she can barely even remember her evening. It doesn’t matter what time it is, the second she starts to feel it, she opens a bottle.

This process has worked for months, but when she stumbles on a note written by Nic to her, the agony hits her like a truck. She finds the letters Lucas saved from Nic, and sets one on his desk. She isn’t sure why she did it, but it was because she subconsciously knows Lucas needs a push to take him out of the dark place they are both in. They both need it. She drinks herself numb that night, but now even the liquor cant suppress the can of emotions she’s opened. She writes down notes similar to Nic’s to Lucas, and puts some of them in his lunch for the next day. She can’t communicate with her son, but Nic has always shared his real emotion and love through his notes, so she uses his method. The notes are a way to reach out, a way of communicating her pain.

While Lucas is at school the next day, she wakes up sober and instead of working or drinking to cope with the dreams of her family once whole, she rereads the notes again, and starts scribbling down more notes, some even to Nic. She falls asleep to this. 

Later she wakes up to the sound of a door slamming shut. Realizing Lucas has come home and probably seen her mess, she decides to see if he’s okay, but finds him on the floor of his room, breathing heavily, eyes squeezed shut, panicked. The memory of Nic’s death floods back and she panics, reaching for Lucas, shaking him, yelling her sons name. It’s irrational, but she can’t lose another son. When he looks into her eyes, she knows she’s been wrong this entire time. Her son needs her, and she needs her son. They reconnect.

SCRIPT !!

     I wrote a script based on my outline for my short film. I did this mainly just so my actors have something to work with, so it is far more about what the characters are physically doing and what they are thinking, in order to help them act.

Here it is!

1      HOME LIFE - NIGHT

Slow fade in.

Low tracking forward showing MOM on the couch. Room is dark, tv is loudly playing sound. MOM's face is illuminated by the flashing lights of the tv screen.

Close ups on: on broken bottle on the floor, empty bottles tipped over, Mom looking at the tv with a empty stare (excluding eyes). Behind her, the door opens, LUCAS in off screen. LUCAS , setting his backpack on the floor. Mom sees, but turns back to the screen.

                MOTHER

        (Slurred words, clear that she has been drinking.)

    Heeey honey. How was school?

LUCAS knows his mother is drunk, and doesn't care to know why he is getting home from school at 9p.m. He spends most of his time at the skate park, bike riding anywhere he wants, anything to distract himself enough to forget what time it is. He only returns once it's too dark and the bugs became bothersome, and his mother never questions his late return.

LUCAS looks down and turns away.

                LUCAS

        (words slurred, wanting to finish the shallow conversation as soon as he can)

    S'fine.

MOM takes another sip out of the bottle in her hand. Then briefly turns back to LUCAS.

                MOTHER

    Well alright then.

LUCAS opens a small pizza box, finds it empty. He eyes over his shoulder to where his MOTHER is, but changes his mind, settling for a granola bar instead and walking out towards his room.

2     THE FIRST NOTE - LUCAS' BEDROOM                            

LUCAS walks in eating the granola bar. He harshly sits down at his desk, opening his computer to do homework. Something catches his attention out of the corner of his eye.

He sees a blue sticky note with black writing on it. Instantly recognizing it, his eyebrows slightly furrow, confused. LUCAS picks up the note, recognizing it as a note his brother NIC wrote to him 2 years ago.

It reads : Good luck on your algebra test, remember everything we practiced - NIC

He stares at it for a second, confused, frozen in a memory, but then he quickly shuts it into his desk drawer. Out of sight, out of mind. He turns back to his computer before taking another look at the drawer, then rids the thought out of his mind. Turns back to his computer

3     MORE NOTES - SCHOOL CAFETERIA

LUCAS makes his way into the school cafeteria. He has headphones on, his hood is up, isolating himself from others. He makes himself as unapproachable as he can. LUCAS gets his drink out of the vending machine, lunchbox in hand, and makes his way to his usual lunch spot.

He leans against the wall and drags himself to sit down on the floor. He opens his lunchbox, and it caught off guard when he finds more notes inside. The first couple are similar to the previous one, same hand writing. As he reads them, the music playing from his headphones begins to fade, and a buzzing/static white noise begins is heard.

.It reads : You're gonna aice your English exam! - NIC

.The second : You're the coolest little brother, love you - NIC

.The third : Remember when we got locked out of the house lol - NIC

LUCAS is confused how these notes got in his lunchbox in the first place, but then his heart stops as he sees the next two.

.I believe in you, you'll do great - NIC

.Hi Lucas! Good luck in bio You got this! - NIC

The other notes were in the same blue paper, in his brother's handwriting. These notes were in a different handwriting, different paper; they were new. LUCAS feels confused, conflicted, lost, afraid. He's spent so much time trying to push these memories out of his mind, and now this sudden reminder, confrontation, gives him many questions with no answers: Who's giving these old notes to him? Is this a sick prank? Who wrote these knew ones? That's not NIC's handwriting, he knows NIC's handwriting. Why now? Why did it have to be NIC?

Cut to black. School Bell.

4      MORE AND MORE AND MORE NOTES - BACK HOME, DAY

LUCAS walks through the front door, rubbing his face, feeling even more exhausted. Walking into the living room, his face shifts to a shocked expression. He sees MOTHER asleep on the couch, pen in hand, dried tears on her face. A note, just like the new ones he found in his lunchbox is in her hand. And all over the couch, floor, coffee table.

As he scans over them, NIC's name gets bigger and messier, a framed picture of NIC lays there as well. Until there is one that he stops on, with just his name softly written, taking up the whole sticky note. LUCAS stumbles backwards, overwhelmed, he starts having memories of his brother flood back.

FLASH back to boy running to his room

FLASH his brother playfully tickling him to the floor FLASH he falls back against the door FLASH brother, Mom, and boy laughing and talking during a movie CUT him watching and looking up to his brother playing soccer, his mom with him, happy and pointing out the brother CUT family game night, LUCAS wins

                MOTHER, NIC

    Woaaahhh! (speaking over eachother)

                NIC

    How the actual hell?

                MOTHER

    You're getting better and better by the day

                NIC

    Okay he's gotta he cheating, come on

                MOTHER

    Nic...

                

CUT the boy crying and hugging his mom, her comforting him but looking off CUT the boy knocking on the moms door asking for her CUT mom drunk, cussing out the boy for doing the dishes wrong FAST CUTS

Black out.

Ear ringing noises, with vague shouts

                MOTHER

    Lucus! Lucas can you hear me?

Opens with an over the shoulder the mom shaking him yelling his name with genuine concern.

                MOTHER

    Oh my god, are you okay? What hurts? Honey say something!

He looks her, tears on his face, we see the mother’s whole face for the first time, she looks down and sees him clutching the notes. She looks at him with a frozen expression, feeling caught and vulnerable, ashamed for letting him see her writing these notes. He rises and wraps his arms around her.

                LUCAS

    Mom...I miss him..

    I miss Nic so much.

                MOTHER

        (Her face softens and she hugs him back)

    Me too, honey. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.

Two shot of the two on the floor, hugging. Camera slowly zooms out and then fades to black.

Starting social media

     I figured it was time to start my social media, however I am very lost on where to start. First of all, I will be using Instagram. My short film is centered around family, with the main character being a teenage boy. I was my target audience to be all genders ages 14-30. I am able to have a very wide target audience, since it deals with the grief of both the child and the parent. So, I felt a platform which reaches this age range was Instagram.

Next, I  haven't named or customized my social media, because I have no content to post yet, and I don't have a name yet. So, for now It will be called short_filmmedia. Just like I discussed in my group meeting, I think a good way to start this page is by doing casting announcements. 

I simply asked Martin for a picture of himself.

So here was post one!

CASTING

    CHARCTERS

There are three actors I'll need in my short film, which I still have not come up with a name for...uh oh...

Lucas: Main character. Young boy who lost his older brother, forced to grieve alone. He ended up isolating himself because he was unable to deal with his grief.

Mother: Lucas' mom lost her eldest son. She was so struck by grief, she drank excessively in order to dumb her pain and ease her mind. She still cares deeply for her younger son, and fears for his well-being after losing Nic, but she is unable to give him attention. 

Nic: Eldest son who passed away. Had a deep connection with his mother and brother. Often wrote encouraging or funny notes to Lucas to show that he cares. Cause of death; unknown medical complications.

  CASTING

    I have a friend from my French competition club named Martin, who I had previously asked if he liked acting and if he'd ever be willing to act in something that I produced for aice media, and he said yes, so I send him a text asking if he's be willing to take part in my short film, and he said yes! He will be playing the role of Lucas.

For the mother, I have someone in mind, however I need to get confirmation from her that she is willing. This is the message I will send Diana. 

"Hi Diana! This is Bia from theatre last year and santi’s friend :)

So im producing a short film for my aice media A level class and i was wondering if you’d be available and willing to act in it?"

ARE WE READY TO RUMBLE?!?!?!?!?!?!

     Guess who FINALLY finished their completed their full short film outline? Yeah me obviously. So today in class I just kind of locked in and everything clicked. So here is my outline:

    Slow fade in, slow tracking forward showing mom on the couch, room is dark, tv is loudly playing sound. Close up on broken bottle on the floor, empty bottles, mom looking at the tv with a empty stare. Door opens, MC walkings in, setting His backpack on the floor. Mom sees, but turns back to the screen. “heeeyyyyy honey! How was school? (stress on school, downwards intonation).” He looks at the living room where his mom is, and turns away from his mother “s’fine” (it’s fine, but words are meshed together). Cut back to mom, she takes another sip, glances back at her son, and glances back to the tv screen “(mumbled with disinterest) alright then”. The boy opens a pizza box to find it empty, then resolves to get a granola bar or just something simple, and heads to his  room.

    He gets to his room, and begins to do homework on his desk, when suddenly something catches her attention out of the corner of her eye. Cut to a close up focused on a note, focus shifts to the boy again, confused, picks up the notes and reads it. The note is one that his brother wrote to him a year ago, encouraging him to do well on his math test, and signed with his name. His heart races with the memory but he sets it back down in a drawer and shuts it. Out of sight out of mind, he isn’t going to let this misplaced note bring him back to confront his grief. He opens his computer to distract himself with his homework; transition to school. He makes his way into the cafeteria getting bumps on the way to where he sits alone, having isolated himself from several of his friends. He opens his lunch box and finds more notes in there. The first is another previous one, and there are two more, with similar encouragement and loving messages, however in different paper and handwriting. He at first is confused by the first one, with just the slightest hint of a smile, then reads the others and it conflicted and lost. Black out, sound of school bell and bus. 

    The boy is walking back home and he gets in, seeing his mom asleep on the couch. He sees in her hand, a piece of paper with another note written down, he sees more on the floor and the coffee table, each with his brother’s name getting bigger and bigger, until there is one with just his name, written softy. 

He stumbles backwards, overwhelmed, clutching them and starts having memories of his brother flood back. A family picture sits on the mantle, zoom in on that or something.

FLASH He see his brother chasing after him in a game of tag FLASH back to boy running to his room FLASH his brother playfully tickling him to the floor FLASH he falls back against the door FLASH brother, Mom, and boy laughing and talking during a movie CUT him watching and looking up to his brother playing soccer, his mom with him, happy and pointing out the brother CUT family game night, boy wins and the mom and brother go WOOAAHH  CUT the boy crying and hugging his mom, her comforting him but looking off CUT the boy knocking on the moms door asking for her CUT mom drunk, cussing out the boy for doing the dishes wrong (FAST CUTS)

Black out.

    Opens again with an over the shoulder the mom shaking him yelling his name with genuine concern. He looks her her, tears on his face, we see the mother’s whole face for the first time, she looks down and sees him clutching the notes. She looks at him with a frozen expression, feeling caught and vulnerable, ashamed for letting him see her writing these notes. He rises and wraps his arms around her, “i miss him mom” with a sob. Her face softens and she hugs him back “Me too honey. I’m sorry.”

Two shot of the two on the floor, camera slowly zooms out and then fades to black.

After I wrote this I asked my teacher to review this, and she liked it, however she said that before the flashing sequence I should put some sort of visual of the brother.